Pages

Friday, 1 September 2017

dead shack

ki ora every. this is  dash paragraphs please give a comment


As Connor and Whakahotu creeped into the petrified, ghostly oak trees surrounding  an abandoned shack. A light flickered from a boy's room but he had died 2 years ago. In a split second there was a gun fire and a scream and and another. “What was that?” wondered Connor.
Suddenly a witch appeared holding his son's chuck doll. The doll stood and moved towards them. Their hearts’ racing, a look of fear filled their faces. Connor & Whakahotu  started running...

1 comment:

  1. Hi Whakahotu. Sorry I meant to say hi my name is Tatyana and I am a year 6.I am a student at Hay Park School.So about your story I didn't get it that well but I think it was okay.But I am going to help you with the tittle.So you should talk about the tittle more so the people can have a bit of information of your tittle.

    So that is all I am going to comment to you.

    Ka Ki te ano. And I meant good bye.

    ReplyDelete